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#HAWMC Day 15: My life in a catch-phrase…

#HAWMC Day 15: “Health tagline” Give yourself, your blog, your condition, or some aspect of your health a tagline. Make sure it’s catchy! 

Did it from day one!!! \m/

I wonder who they'd get to play "Me."??
I wonder who they’d get to play “Me.”??



“Chronically afflicted” in a made-for-tv-movie kind’o’life


I use “afflicted” because I believe that the more someone hears the word “ill” or “illness”…that’s what they begin (even on a subconscious level) to believe about themselves.


“I am sick.”

“I am ill.”

“I have an illness.”

Dunno ’bout you, but I am certainly NOT my disease…why on earth would I continue to plaster myself with that label???

Makes no sense to me.

I’ve even had a social media guru tell me, “Your blog will be overlooked on some of the SEO keywords because people Google for “chronic illness” rather than “chronic afflictions.””

Not my problem to own, is it there, sweetcheeks.

In a made-for-tv-movie kind’o’life? What’s that all about??

Have you read my posts?? 😉

Because even Oprah herself wouldn’t believe half the shit that goes on in my little bat-shit crazy Cosmos on this beautiful blue orb in the universe.

Remember the frozen Hoo-Ha?

Remember the twinling that shat down my floor vents?

Hey, how about drama of bullying?

What about the research and scientificky parts?

I am a walking made-for-tv-movie, I tell you that right now.

I sometimes wish there was a reality show of my life, to be honest. I think it would be an even more realistic view into the world of chronic afflictions…

The appointments. The embarrassments. The crawling up of the stairs because the legs are being asshats.

The total joy over the seemingly insignificant happenstances because, seriously…sometimes it really IS about the little things.

The gut busting laughs afforded by people who have had to generously change THEIR perspectives about me and my abilities during this journey.

The highlights of hands that don’t work when you need them to.

The lowlights of the ugly cries.

The power of human touch when my husband holds me while having an utter and complete breakdown…

We were watching an interview with an NHL’er who had recently lost his beautiful, young wife to a rare liver cancer. Katie Moore.

I would have liked my reality show to document how this story was that proverbial “straw”…unleashing an inner anguish that I’d been bottling up for weeks.

I broke with tears that could have matched the rain.

See, in a reality show, you would have these moments of conversation…the character would be telling you, in their own words, what was going through their minds at that given moment.

I had my reasons for breaking, yes, that are mine alone.

When I’d stolen a fuzzy glance at my husband, whose powerful embrace made me feel like being in the safest place in the world, I saw his own tears.

He told me he wasn’t losing me…nu-uh…no way.

The camera would have caught something perhaps a little unexpected…

…it was the slight downturn of my eyes and brief smile across my lips…

In my head, I thought to myself, “Oh, Shane, sweetie…dying would be an utmost form of relief for me…I’m crying because although I know you would continue to have a successful and eventful life…it would be ME who would no longer be able to live with YOU.”

And then there would be this montage of photos of us through our life together…

…and then there would be this awesome theme song cued in and the images would morph into showing me pushing my Go, Go SpazzyAss through the weight training and the moving and the doing and the EVERYthing…

Because this movie is an eleventy-billion part-er…kind of like Star Wars…but without the Jar Jar Binks.

Because, seriously…who would believe that?!?! 😉



  1. Heidi

    Many of us would believe it, we are living through many things on our own, but most of us (me) are not able to vocalize how we are feeling. Thanks for the strength and the knowledge that our lives are not the only one that is shit as crazy and that spazzy hands are a real thing that others have …. I AM NOT ALONE! – Just hope I get a diagnosis soon to know what the hell I have!

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