Another couple of weeks…another test of purposely finding the the small things around me that bring me into the moment…lift me out of the pain or the stress or the fatigue…or the…well. That.
People are still continuing to own their shit, which in turn, makes me happy.
I am sooooooooo not a purple painted ponies pooping butterflies jacked up on SugarSmacks kind’o’gal, let me be clear.
I don’t stand for people invalidating the chaos of my (or your) reality with puppies and kittens and rainbows’n’shit. Although, the dog shaming photos have me grabbing for the inhaler on many occasions! *giggle*
However, it’s up to “Me.” (hence, “You.”) to own your shit and get yourself out of the madness before the shadows creep in to take over the recesses of the depths of your mental health.
[enter #gladitude, stage left]
Past couple of weeks have been pretty stellar, though the trip to the Urgent Care clinic and the resulting, “Hey, great news! You’ve not had another heart attack, you’ve just got yourself a case of costochondritis! It’ll go away. In 6-8 weeks.”
You know, coupled with the pleurisy and the pericarditis, I’ve got myself a trifecta of HOUNDSOFHELLPAIN I really wouldn’t wish on anyone. *shrug*
And it scares me.
Because Lupus is an asshat and doesn’t play fair when trying to manage…y’know…life.
I had simple moments of funny faces between either of my twin boys and myself.
I had simple moments of just watching my only daughter talk about her friends and the teacher and the holidays and the brothers and the snow and the…*takes a breath*…she’s so extroverted. Opposite of myself. It’s very fun to watch.
I had simple moments of pink sky painted clouds in the morning on a minus-eleventy-billion-degree-Celsius morning at the school bus stop.
I had simple moments of being caught bopping up and down to “Santa, baby” at the toy store because…hey…it’s “Santa, baby!” \m/
I had simple moments of hanging stockings at our hearth…seven of them…because my children are all home, all safe, all healthy, and all just as bat-shit crazy as their mother. 😉
I had a simple moment of Twitter fan-girl #gladitude by @ClinicalLuxury taking a moment of their own to indulge in a coconut latte…and sharing it with me. \m/
The past couple of weeks I’ve noticed a trend, and I’d like to share it with you, because of all of the attention given to the mantra: You reap what you sow.
Or, “you get back what you put out.”
I’ve got enough. Love, food, happiness, children (totally, just sayin’), treats for Yule, home, warmth…and I am content. I verily choose to believe that I’ve got enough.
Things are very interesting when you put that “out”…you keep getting back in a positive, constructive manner. I receive holiday cards from friends who don’t have a lot of time, themselves, but took a few minutes of their own day to include me and my family in theirs…I received a generous gift of fuzzy, most colourful socks, because someone thought of me and passion for all things “Colour!!” I received generosity the likes of which I’ve not seen in YEARS to go splurge on myself in craft store so that I can continue to share what I create and bring smiles not only to myself…that makes me happy. 😀
Last year? I exuded stress. It was sooooooo stressful, with my eldest, my second boy’s visit to co-ordinate, the budget, the schedule between our parents, etc, etc.
Last year fookin’ SUCKED.
Food for thought.
I hope you find yourself, during the impending stress of holiday “bliss”, bopping to your favourite song in the mall…leave yourself plenty of time, understand that other people haven’t found their #gladitude and are stressed right there with you…pick up some colour and flash a smile in someone’s direction…no matter their mood.
One thing I’ve learned about chronic illness?
Smiles are contagious. 😉