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Experiencing life at several wtf’s per second….

Another doctor’s appointment….another day of “wtf”….luckily, I didn’t have to “bring it”….she’s a really good doctor. As in, amazingly wonderful at listening.

Verdict is in, but only halfway….I DO need to start medication for my diabetes (FRAK!!!)…but guess what….the lab results? She didn’t have them yet….so I can’t fill out the prescription until she can get them to send her another one….it’s got a result on it that will clarify which dosage to start at, as well as how often I will need to test. Of course (I still need to make a t-shirt saying that…)

That’s medication #1.

Medication #2 is to help me acquire a better quality of sleep which, in turn, is supposed to somewhat help with the level of chronic fatigue that accompanies both the disease (lupus) and the syndrome (fibro)…it s going to block neuotransmitters from reabsorbing certain chemicals….blah blah blah…..

Sound familiar?? It should.
It’s a tricyclic anti-depressant.
Which, i’m told, will also obviously assist in my feeling like I’m the only frakkin’ person on the planet who “gets it” or cares….meaning: When my well-intentioned, wants to do SOMEthing, friends and family tell me, “I don’t know what to say”….I won’t give a #$% either way.
“I don’t know what to say……” *sigh* I need to find a book for everyone else to read, it would seem…
Anti-depressants: The wonder drugs that don’t make you feel yucky anymore….and, really, don’t make you feel anything at all!!
But, the sleep issue is at the forefront of that one….whatever.
What else….hmmmmmmmmmm….oh! Got the prescription for massage therapy!! Yay!! And then she made me very much aware that I will need to gauge how i’m feeling prior to going. Why? Because this ain’t your spouse’s back rub….no, if I’ve got a good flare going on…this could very well send my pain receptors through the roof!!
Damn. Never thought of that.
Oh yes….the kicker….
Why not.
At this rate, I could literally wear an “awareness” t-shirt for an entire week with everything I’ve got.
What now?
She’s faxing in a referral to a rheumatologist (did I even spell that right?). She will call me back once she’s got those lab results re: dosage for the diabetes meds. I will continue to see her every 2-3 weeks until the rheumy office starts.
Me? Well, I’d really like to start looking at some aqua fitness classes of some kind….but of course…it has to be on an available day, at a good start time….y’know….cuz I’ve got five kids, a job and a house to manage…..
I’d love to find a support group. Not for me, for my family. On-line, in person…who cares which!
Then I’d like to sit down and come up with some goals to work on/towards for the maintenance of “ME”.
Right now, however, I’m going to take a bit of time to digest the total annihilation of everything I once knew and try to process all this new-found “new-ness”.
Greens+ update: capsules are great.
Nicotine update: Smoke free for 2 weeks, 1 day. NO patch.

1 Comment

  1. Shane

    As for the not knowing what to say, it's very true. I can't very well say "I know how you feel" because I don't. Yes, I've felt pretty crappy at times, but I know it's not even close to what you are going through. That statement would be worse. "What can I do to make it better?" That statement is bogus as well. From what I read in that book tonight, that's a no-no to say as well. There is NOTHING I can do to fix that. It's hard for me to accept that, but it's true. There has to be something that covers, "I acknowledge what you're saying and that you are in extreme amounts of pain. I wish I could fix this problem and make it all go away.".

    I think I know what to say.

    "I love you."

    I think that covers it.

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