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Don’t judge a deed by its cover…

Sometimes, you just have to count on the little things to get you through the chaos of living with chronic illness.

Sometimes, you just have to count on the little things to get you through life. No matter what creed, race, colour, beliefs or which Dr. Who is your favourite.

There’s a meme that’s been floating around on social media that refers to the concept of smiling at people, because it could be the only good thing they see that day.

Something like that.

ANYhooooooooooo…today is just such a day, and I’m going to tell you why you should never underestimate the opportunity to find a lil’ #gladitude, or to bring a lil’ luvin’ to someone, should the mood strike…

20130416_1659071) I received a book in the mail today. Said book was recommended by my Geeky Godmother, so I know it has to be a good one. Escapism, in whatever form, often is the band-aid to the chaos of my reality. I still have to own my shit, but for a temporary spell of time, I can transport myself somewhere NOT chronically afflicted. NOT stressed to the tits. NOT nauseated by anxiety.

I am stupid *giddy* to give this a read…and rather pleased that I had “purchased” said book with credits provided to me for my past participation in research projects. I’d forgotten about them. It was a crazy, random happenstance that I’d opened up my account (being in Canada, we have our “own” site, to which these credits did not apply) and seen them after clicking the link within GG’s review of “The Calumnist Malefesto“.

Better yet…the author is the brother of an outstandingly creative talent here in the Ottawa region, Edith Chartier of Silver Lotus…a most wonderful woman to know. 😀

20130416_1505132) I had a “surprise” left for me in our mailbox. First of all, it is incredibly important to note that said gifter of awesomeness did not ring the doorbell. The “unexpected” would have damn near killed me (extra-sensitive over-processed nerves)  and it was also during my “down time”…that time wherein I shut everything off and bring my body to a state of “veggin’.” Second to note, said gifter of awesomeness recognized the importance of some of the nutritional changes I’ve made and thus made it become important to them…Thirdly to note…

…is why this was so appreciated.

Today I am stressed. Today I am nervous. Today I have been manifesting the chaos of my reality physically in the form of relentless chest pains.

Yesterday, I discovered that one of my twins has slight hearing loss in both of his ears. Meh. I further discovered that my other twin has a mild-moderate hearing loss in his right ear, and a slight-mild loss in his left.


They’d been taken to the Canadian Hearing Society to rule out the possibility of hearing problems that could be augmenting their language learning disabilities. Let the appointment-making begin…physician, ENT referrals and a re-test within the next three months.

Now the extra-biggie:

Tomorrow, I’m driving my eldest son to tour a residential substance abuse rehabilitation facility.

No, I am not invalidating my stress levels with a cacophony of “Be glad he’s going!” I am acknowledging my academic “intellect” to already know this, and am merely being a mother who is hurting as badly as her oldest “baby.”

He is coming to stay the night tonight because we have to leave with the birds tomorrow morning.

He has not been in the house since the Christmas holidays.

I’ve seen him only two consecutive days since then to help him with a medical matter, unrelated to his “use.”

I’m excited. I’m fearful. I’m nervous. I’m scared. I’m hopeful. I’m resigned.

I’m damn well eating the chocolatey goodness that was left on my doorstep and it makes me thoroughly happy on the inside.

One small gesture with gargantuan implications.

It means someone believes in me…and by knowing someone believes in me, it makes me brave…and by being brave, I can help the people in my life who need it.



    • Brynn

      It is so very much appreciated 🙂 I think of your #chronicallyawesome self a LOT (but, like, totally non-creeper, I swear) and it helps me keep on keepin’ on. Y’know? Sending a stockpile of hugs…I’ll leave them in the corner…take one as you need 😉 xoxo

  1. Pamela

    Hey hon, just sending you a Hug and a smile. If you are concerned about the twins and their hearing loss, please don’t hesitate to reach out. Remember I have only 35% normal hearing… They too can have a “normal” or “exceptional” life.

    Blessings for the day!


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